How We Came to Adopt Caroline

Up until two years ago, our family plan was set---we had always desired to have one boy and one girl, and God had blessed us with Joshua and Katie. They are an incredible joy in our lives and we both love being their parents.

However, on July 15, 2004 God began to reveal that He had something different in mind. Scott was driving to work listening to a Focus on the Family broadcast about the sad plight of little girls in China. Scott was listening with interest as the information was new to him. At the end of the broadcast, Dr. James Dobson said they decided to cover this topic with the hope that someone listening would have room in their heart to welcome one of these abandoned children into their family. At that moment (to his surprise), Scott's eyes began to water and the thought "what about our family?" crossed his mind. He immediately prayed that God would make it absolutely clear to him whether or not to mention what had happened to Amy.

When the weekend came, Scott was driving to Durham, NC with the Joshua and Katie for a family birthday (Amy was out of town with friends). Out of the blue, Joshua (4 yrs old at the time) said, "Hey Dad, why do little children have to live in orphanages?” Scott literally pulled off the side of the road and asked him to repeat the question--which he did word for word. Scott decided that the Lord had spoken, and that he would mention this to Amy.

Admittedly, Scott was not looking forward to talking with Amy as this was so far from where he knew they both were. God led Scott to I Peter 1:3--“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In His great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope”. This encouragement led Scott to share with Amy what he was experiencing.

Amy immediately started crying, but not for the reason Scott expected. Amy had recently attended a women’s conference, had gone through a Bible study focused on faith and action, and read a book Radically Obedient, Radically Blessed. Amy was confident God was preparing her for something outside of her comfort zone. She immediately knew that this “something” was the bombshell Scott just dropped.

After this conversation, we decided to pray and wait for God to confirm that we should adopt a little girl from China. Part of the problem was the “practical considerations”—namely the financial ramifications. Over the previous four years, we had invested a considerable amount of our resources into a company Scott had cofounded. We also felt God needed to change our hearts to actually desire a third child instead of simply feeling compelled to adopt.

Over the next five months, God provided both the confirmation and heart change. For example, a week after our “talk”, a good friend (knowing we were not planning for any more children) asked Amy, “Have you ever thought about adopting a child?” Also, a co-leader with Scott at our church’s Awana program had adopted two girls from China already and was getting prepared for a third. In addition, a woman in Amy’s Bible study had also gone through the process.

The heart change happened as well. We began to long for Caroline and felt unconditional love in our hearts for her. The question became “not if, but when”. In November 2004, our pastor delivered the “state of the church” address and focused on the fact that God has prepared works for us in advance…we simply must obey and leave the practical considerations to Him. We both confess that we were not hearing him talk about the church’s expansion plans, but instead were hearing that we needed to start the adoption process immediately regardless of the financial ramifications.

That very night at church, Scott’s Awana coleader approached him and said “I want you to know that there is a new U.S. tax law that allows you a $10,000 tax deduction towards the cost of international adoption”. A week later, some friends gave us a significant financial gift because they were confident God wanted them to participate in this little girl’s life and what He has planned for her.

This process has taught us a lot about how God our Creator desires to be personally involved in each of our lives. We are learning a tremendous amount about what it means to follow God by faith...seeking His will through the Bible, prayer, and wise counsel. Being alert and ready for circumstances that would point us in a direction that would bring Him honor and joy.

God has over and over again proved Himself to be sovereign and intimately involved in our lives. Never before have we felt so blessed to be specifically chosen by God to participate in something He desires. We are humbled by the fact that He had to basically speak audibly to us in order for us to listen, and this has challenged us to be more in tune with Him. We feel privileged to have this opportunity and are incredibly excited to have Caroline in our family.